I Don’t Feeling Like Writing Today

This is definitely not me today.

I think every writer feels like this once in awhile. You know, the dreaded “I don’t feel like it [writing]” coupled with what I term “empty brain syndrome”. I’d even go so far as to say writers feel like this more often than once in awhile. I know I do-I just don’t feel like writing today. This girl is FRESH out of ideas. I even checked my phone notes – nada. I thought briefly about recycling one of my old blogs but I’ve only been at this a few months, but I didn’t want to do that.

Why? I mean, I suppose I could. But to me, that’s like when a brand new TV series that you’re really looking forward to skips a fresh new episode, then you see there’s a rerun in it’s place on the cable guide and you’re like, really? Already? So, NOT TODAY, Satan! I don’t want my readers (all seven of you, ha ha) to feel like that, even IF the inside of my brain looks like white noise at the moment.

A rare look inside my brain. Where’s Carol-Anne when I need her? Heh heh.

So even though I don’t feel like writing today, I’m committed to this blog (and you, loyal readers) to turn out content. Ergo, thought I to myself, I’ll just write a blog about how I don’t feel like writing and see where it goes from there. So again, even though my brain is shooting me the bird at the thought of any (in my opinion) decent writing ideas, I’M GONNA WRITE ANYWAY BECAUSE I AM COMMITTED TO THIS BLOG AND THIS IS A BIG DEAL. Sorry for yelling. I’m not yelling at you. I’m yelling at myself because I am a CHAMP at breaking commitments. Let me tell you how much of a commitment-phobe I am. I even had to look up the word “commitment” to check how to spell it.

Yes, yes I am. And I will keep telling myself this if I have to tattoo it on my forehead.

But Meredith, aren’t you married? That’s a huge commitment, no?

It is, but I’ve never really had a problem with personal commitments – at least in relationships. But I have had a problem in the past sticking with stuff like writing. Like fitness. Lifestyle changes like not eating everything that isn’t nailed down. However, I’m pleased to say that over the last few months I have been committed to turning out SOME kind of new content every Thursday…I mean, who was it that said, “if you want to be a writer, then WRITE.” So that’s what I’m doing, even if it’s schlock. I hope THIS isn’t schlock, but if it is, at least I hope it’s relatable schlock.

Here’s a funny llama gif just for the hell of it.

But yeah, back to my problem with commitment. Which I’m sure a lot of people can relate to – it’s HARD to commit yourself to something! For example, I always thought I would grow up to write the Great American Novel that would sell a million copies and be on the New York Times Best Seller List, yet I can’t get any ideas off the ground. Although I did write a novella once, and even self published it, but I can’t seem to get back to the idea of actually writing more than a thousand words at a time.

So, at this point, I’ve relegated myself to the fact that I’m never going to be the next Stephen King, and that’s okay. We can’t all be novelists. BUT! We do what we can, and I have learned to stop beating myself up about it. You know how you can stop beating yourself up?

You make small goals and you –

Wait for it…

YOU COMMIT YOURSELF TO THEM. Then you ACHIEVE them. And then when you actually MEET your goal, however small, you can stop beating yourself up about not being committed to something!

TAH DAH! You have now met your goal.
Feels good, doesn’t it?

Hi. I am now a self help blog. And I know most of you know this already. But as for me, it’s taken me THIS long (being in my mid forties) for the idea of committing to small, achievable goals rather than these towering, unattainable goals to kick in.

I never said I was a fast learner.

Anyway – I guess my point is, commitment even to something small like writing a weekly blog or keeping up with my fitness isn’t easy – and let me interrupt myself here to say that at FORTY SIX YEARS OLD jumping back on the fitness wagon is NOT easy, but I am on my FOURTH WEEK of consistently working out five days a week – go Meredith – but commitment to something small is DOABLE. And I’m doing what is doable! And I guess that’s my whole point this week; I’m achieving the goals that I’ve committed myself to (even when I don’t necessarily feel like it), and I’m pretty happy about that. 🙂

Hmmph. Even though I didn’t initially feel like writing today, I just managed to write a whole entire blog about an actual subject! Not bad for having not one iota of an idea when I started, huh?

Indeed, Bill and Ted. Not bad at all.

See you next time, and thanks for reading!

As always,
Meredith Silverman

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