Busted Seams and Quarantine Dreams

My husband sews better than me and I’m okay with that.

As Mr. Husband sewed up yet another busted inseam on my yoga pants last night (welcome to being a full figured woman-but hey, thick thighs save lives, or so I hear) while discussing some of the recent weird dreams we’ve been having, I thought, what a great title for a blog! Especially now, right? As the LA Times put it, “coronavirus dreams” or “quarantine dreams” are a real thing at the moment. I thought it was just me, but apparently many of us are having some freaky-ass dreams right now. Maybe that’s our brains’ way of coping with what’s going on. At any rate, Busted Seams and Quarantine Dreams it is for this week’s entry.

Speaking of busted seams, I’m fairly sure I’ve put on the “covid nineteen”. Or is it “quarantine fifteen”? Well either way, ugh. You’d think I’d be using this time to exercise, right? Unfortunately, no. That is, not as often as I’d like. Mr. Husband and I have gotten out for a few walks recently, but mostly, it’s been looking a lot like this around here:

Pretty soon that “covid nineteen” gonna be the “quaran-thirty”. Sheesh.

I know, I know. Don’t complain, Meredith. It’s a lot of people out here out of work and struggling right now. I’m just grateful we have enough to eat, believe me! If I put on a little weight and bust a few seams, I can live. I’m just glad my husband knows how to sew, God bless him. Because I’ll tell you what, you’re not going to find ME out at Target looking for new pants! Believe me y’all, I’m doing my part. Like the man says:

When the (former) Governator tells you to stay at home, YOU STAY AT HOME.

Moving right along.

Anyway, as for weird dreams, we ALL (Mr. Husband, Ma and myself) have been having plenty of strange ones. Again, I can’t help but think that’s our subconscious trying to sort out what’s happening in our waking life. I’m dying to read the L.A. Times article about it, but they’re behind a paywall and I’m too cheap to subscribe right now. However, the headline itself was pretty reassuring that I’m not alone in having bizarro dreams.

Apart from dreams and seams, dang. I just realized that this particular blog could totally be a Seinfeld episode. It’s a blog about freakin’ NOTHING. LOL.

They can’t all be winners, folks.

I don’t know. Just like last week, I was determined to turn SOMETHING out today. What can I tell you that we haven’t already seen all over the news and all over social media? Stuff kind of sucks right now, I know. But, I’m determined to find stuff to be grateful for, even though things are so upside down we are all losing track of the days. I mean, to be honest, it’s even hard to drag myself into the shower at this point. Matter of fact, I told Mr. Husband just this morning that before this pandemic is over, we’re all going to wind up rolling around the house like fat little stinky meatballs trying to figure out what the hell day it is, talking about what we dreamed about last night, and wondering what’s for lunch!

Full disclosure? I just looked for a meatball gif but the first one I found was WAAAAAY too horrifying to post here. Oh, you want to see it anyway?

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

On top of everything else, now Easter is coming up on Sunday. I know it’s going to be a lot of disappointed, upset people out there due to no family gatherings and no going to church. As for me, my family has shrunk over the years to just Ma and I (but we are VERY grateful to have Mr. Husband this year), so we’re used to it being just us. I reckon that’s a small thing to be grateful for; no big family to worry about. My heart goes out to the folks that DO have big families; but at least there is technology to bring people together when they can’t be together physically.

And please, please, don’t fly in the face of social distancing by stubbornly having a family gathering or going someplace like church right now; that’s not going to help flatten the curve whatsoever. Once again, we all gotta do our parts, no matter how much it sucks. Just think about how awesome everything will be when this is all over and we can emerge, bleary-eyed, from our hidey-holes like the naked little mole rats we are.

I promise not to cry at the gloriousness of it all.

Final thoughts: I want you to know I’m thinking of you all. I hope you all have a happy, safe, healthy Easter and/or Passover, and remember, as the old saying goes: this too, shall pass. Meanwhile, I’ll be over here in the home trenches with you, talking about our dreams, and wondering what’s for dinner. By the way, what the hell day is it again?

Thanks for reading,

Meredith Silverman

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