Old money hides it, and new money flaunts it. That old saying has been around forever, and so have been those who flaunt it specifically to lord over others. And I know you know who I’m talking about. The Instagram frenemy constantly posting about her fabulous new wardrobe. The sister-in-law who just spent 10 days in the Caribbean and splashes it all over YOUR Facebook feed. Or the passive-aggressive, bitchy coworker who accidentally-on-purpose leaves the webpage open to the $2,000 purse that she just bought.
THAT $2,000 PURSE DOESN’T MAKE YOU A GOOD PERSON, KAREN!
My point? We all know someone who literally lives the whole “whoever dies with the most toys wins” bit. And that’s fine. But those who shove that “win” into the faces of those less fortunate, and do it every chance they get? They are the ones that my gripe is with today. That drives me crazy. Why? Because generally these are the same folks who snap their fingers at wait staff; who treat those they deem “below them” like garbage. And all because they might have a more expensive car, clothing or handbag? This isn’t okay.
Moreover, in this day and age and especially on social media, flaunt-spending is becoming more and more prevalent. But just for the record, I don’t begrudge someone in general a $2,000 purse. If that’s all someone wants out of this life, or they happen to be a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills? Then have at it. But don’t shove it in my face while simultaneously looking down your nose at my well loved $40 Betsey Johnson backpack. What? I got it at Ross! I do likes me a bargain.
Look, I won’t say that I have never gotten jealous when other people have more money and/or things than me. Oh, I seethed with jealousy. Case in point? So I have a friend who does the bookkeeping for a family owned business. Whenever we talk, she spills the tea about the owner’s spoiled-rotten, lazy daughter’s spending habits on company credit cards. I’m talking at least five to ten thousand a month on personal shopping, hair, nails, home furnishings – you name it. And the dad never says anything about it. Mind you, she’s on the payroll but doesn’t do a lick of work. Ah, nepotism at it’s finest.
Anyhow, you’d think unlimited funds and not having to really work for them would make for a happy-go-lucky girl, right? Nope. In this case, money doesn’t buy happiness. Apparently, the daughter is unappreciative, meaner than cat piss and can’t find a boyfriend to save her own life. Then, I heard she publicly fights with her father if he doesn’t give her everything she wants. Not only that, but my friend says the daughter makes everyone’s lives miserable by lording it over the whole place. Hell, I didn’t even have to work there and it made MY life miserable just hearing about it! And jealous? Of course I was. Who wouldn’t be over some ungrateful brat getting everything handed to her on a silver platter?
Careful, Meredith, your claws are showing. Bitter’s not a good look, m’kay?
I know. I know. But this story has a happy ending, at least from my viewpoint. One day I was talking to my mom about ol’ Mean Girl and her spending, and do you know what my mom said about it all? I nearly fell down. She said,
“She must be a very unhappy girl.”
At first I couldn’t imagine how someone could be so unhappy and miserable with basically unlimited funds. I know I’d be THRILLED if I never had to worry about money again. But then Ma explained that when someone is handed their whole lives in a golden spoon, they never appreciate anything. Ever. Nothing ever makes them happy. “So in that case,” Ma said, “what can they buy that is going to make them happy? She can’t buy love, friendship, or a boyfriend like you have, Meredith. She can’t buy a close relationship with her parents like you’ve got. So instead she buys things and makes herself feel better by lording it over whomever she thinks can’t afford them.”
Well. In the words of Shania Twain, “that don’t impress me much.”
To tell you the truth, I stopped being so jealous after that. Not that I stopped completely. I mean, yes, it can be very hard to not be jealous of someone who seems to have it all. It can make a person feel very inferior when they see someone else’s flashy car or expensive accessories. Remember what I said about Facebook and Instagram earlier? I used to compare my life to other people’s and feel like I was falling short. I’d be hideously jealous of folks who seemed to have it easier than me, or had better stuff. In fact, I’d forget to count my own blessings. Actually, that’s why I quit both of those social platforms – but that’s another blog for another time. In the meantime, I have learned to be grateful for what I do have. Blessings? Counted.
At any rate, like I said; a $2,000 purse doesn’t make you a good person. A $2,000 purse doesn’t make you better than me or anyone else on this planet. Stuff like that doesn’t impress me anymore. What I’ll be more impressed by is how you treat other people. You can be a good person who just happens to own a $2,000 purse. But if you’re a miserable bitch, all you are is a miserable bitch with a $2,000 purse. No more, no less.
Look, in the grand scheme of things, all a $2,000 purse does is hold your stuff. It isn’t meant to lord over people and make ’em feel bad. Folks might remember if you owned one, but they’ll most likely forget what it looked like. What people WILL remember, however, is how you treated them and how you made them feel.
That said. how do YOU want to be remembered? As the kindest person they ever knew? Or the hateful bitch with the expensive purse?
You decide.
Thanks for reading,
Meredith Silverman